Implementor

C P Berry Groundworks Limited!

C P BERRY GROUNDWORKS LTD do a lot of work for the local councils throughout the East Midlands, we are local authority accredited.
We also do work for private clients such as house builders and home owners.
We are specialists in Tarmac Laying, Kerbs, Block Paving, Yorkstone, Driveways.

C P Berry Groundworks Limited are digging up the road directly under my bedroom window at 8 o’clock on a Sunday morning

C P Berry Groundworks Limited are cunts. Completely, utterly, and irredeemably.

Fuck you, C P Berry Groundworks Limited!

Included:

1. The road outside my bedroom window being dug up first thing in the morning.
2. My neighbour playing some sort of racing game so that the walls reverberate to the sound of an engine accelerating and decelerating all day. wheeeeeeeEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE UUUUUuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhh. wheeeeeeeEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE UUUUUuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhh. wheeeeeeeEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE UUUUUuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhh.
3. My neighbour watching what almost sounds like but probably isn’t Dad’s Army loud enough that I keep having to turn up the telly to drown it out, even though there’s at least one room and two walls between me and whatever it is he’s watching it on.

Tomorrow: neighbours I have bludgeoned to death with items of their own Audio/Visual equipment.

1. Install Total Recorder on my laptop.
2. Find a CD player with a line–out that’s capable of playing track one of the, incidentally otherwise superb, 2046 soundtrack. Because none of mine will touch the “enhanced” hunk of plastic crap and neither will my PC.

   

3. Connect the line–out to my PC’s line–in and record the track that way, so I can have it in lovely Apple Lossless format, rather than a shitty downloaded low–quality MP3.
4. Take the CD out of the CD player, melt it down, and fashion it into some sort of spike.
5. Find out who’s in charge at EMI Music, track him down, and brutally stab him to death with it.

Must dash: busy!